Day 5-6 – March 23-24th, 2020 – Conflict in Quarantine

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Conflict in Quarantine

Working at home can have its own set of challenges. Where is my home office hub going to be? How can I limit my distractions? What routine can I set up that won’t drive me crazy? This post will go over how to handle conflict in quarantine.

The one thing I did not think to prepare for was conflict. As you may have read in my weekend update, this past Sunday was my husband’s birthday. We were not really in the celebratory mood with all the chaos going on, so it was an off day for my husband. We ended up having a deep discussion about some issues late into the night on Sunday. These issues continued to affect us through Monday and Tuesday and this got me thinking. How can we best avoid conflict during this time?

Conflict is going to happen, but when one or more of your household is stuck at home, it can be a powder keg for issues to arise. Here are some of my thoughts on how to avoid conflict.

I have a post already with some tips about how to communicate in an argument and I will be building off some of those ideas.

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1. Let the little things go

A good starting point is to remember that this is a new and stressful situation for all of you. You may be working from home, laid off, trying to teach your children, etc. It will take a while for this to become more normalized. Since things seem to be in a constant state of change, this will continue to be a challenge. Give each other some grace. We are all in this together and we are trying to do the best we can.

2. Don’t let things build

That being said, if there is a problem be sure to address it as it arises. You may be spending a lot more time with certain family members than you usually do. Routines will collide. If something is bothering you, talk to the person about it. If you don’t talk about it then more and more little things will build to the point where you get annoyed if the person breaths wrong! This will not be a healthy environment in the long run. You may be in quarantine a long time, which leaves a lot of opportunities for conflict.

3. Listen to hear, not respond

If your talk turns into more of an argument, it is important to listen to each other. Many times in a conflict we are listening to the other person and planning what we will say in response. Stop! Actually, listen to what the person is saying. They have a side on this topic for a reason and you will miss it if you keep thinking about yourself.

4. Treat them how you want to be treated

This applies not only when you are in conflict with someone, but it can also be used to avoid conflict! During this time it is important to treat each other kindly. They say relationships should be 50/50, but I disagree. I think they are much more fluid than that. You might need to be 80/20 somedays. If someone in your household is having a tough time, treat them how you want to be treated the next time you are having a bad day.

5. Plan some get away time

No, not like a car you will hop into to run away from the problems. Plan some time to be alone with yourself. Go for a walk, work on a project, read, anything that helps you to relax and recharge. I know this can be easier said than done. Even if it’s just for a few minutes a day or just a few times each week, this can be very helpful.

This one is important for my husband and I. We are not used to me being home all day. There is a chance that he may be homebound too in the near future. I have decided to write out a list of activities that we can do together to pass the time as well as a list of activities that we can do separately if we need time to ourselves. Let’s see how this goes.

Hopefully, this short list will serve as a reminder to you and help you avoid conflict in quarantine. We are all in this together and we need each other to get through it.

Want to know what I have been up to this summer out of quarantine! Check it out here!